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Shopping Carts And Chickenjoys
8.28.2004
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Seems like it's the trend nowadays for my married cousins to hold their children's birthday parties at McDonald's or Jollibee. Probably a better choice for them, rather than cook everything at home and then have everyone raid their house [which makes all breakables susceptible to breaking] and then still have the burden of cleaning up afterwards.
But no matter how fun and convenient it is for them to hold such an impersonal birthday bash, for people like me who a) isn't married b) still under 21 and c) extremely cool, these generic parties rank very, very low in the Toby Fun-O-Rama Meter. Let me give you a rundown why.
1. It's a kiddie party. It's basically for kids. I know sometimes I act like a child but that doesn't mean I have a burning desire to stare amazingly at Ronald McDonald as if he's a giant, dancing eggplant.
2. Dinosaurs. Cowboys. Under the sea. What's with the mundane themeing? Those themes have been there since the beginning of time. All things are rapidly changing, even the word google is now a verb. It wouldn't probably kill if they invent a new theme.
3. Games. How is it possible that they play the same parlor games no matter what branch or food chain you choose? Toothpick and ring / spoon and citrus fruit relay, Bring Me, Longest Happy-Birthdaaaay. How about teaching the kids patriotism and let them play Hit the Pinata shaped like Joseph Estrada's head? And home come in Bring Me, kids are always asked to bring invitations, the longest belt, a sock, and a dancing parent?
4. This is what I hate the most. There's always a game not for kids. Oh yes. Totally beats the idea of a kiddie party: having a game for the I'm-Not-A-Kid, Not-A-Parent crowd. And the reason why I hate it is because I'm always in it. The last time, they made us arrange ourselves according to the category they would announce, like 'arrange yourselves according to IQ'. Well, I did win a flashlight one time. A totally useless flashlight - it doesn't light much.
Anyway, a couple of days before we received the kiddie birthday invitation from one of my cousins. Great. I didn't have an excuse not to go, so I went with the rest of the family.
(Hold your breath - there's more to come)
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